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I don't want to live like this anymore

by The Weight of Water

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1.
The migraine kicks in And you're just halfway through your shift At home packs of bills and pills are waiting for you Your tiredness allows for nothing but mere getting by And everyday you're grinned between stress and meaninglessness This fever is burning Right through your veins The only thing keeping You warm through these days Though tension is rising To drown in your job Be good and productive Keep working hard But you won't be tied down now By these old chains This is your life This is your love This is your pain You rise up Who's now burning Cover your faces Take to the streets Burn their cathedrals Down Bath in relief Storm into factories Keep all your fruits No tears for the past cause Now tears were not shed for you
2.
You get up And go down You put water on the stove You watch it boil You drift away So you see How you left Some friends that you call home You take your back, you take your leave So when you Took off Did you know you gonna change You changed for good You changed at all All of these flashlights All of these bright eyes Being here takes you now further from where you’ve always been And you just feel And you just think And you try not to be at any other place You get back Nothing’s changed But yourself Or that’s what you keep trying to tell yourself So what is next A poor excuse To go back Pick up from where you’ve left and When you finally get there Will it really be where You can lie down and rest without think of the demons in your head Or will you run Or will you see Or will you stop the old and ever in between Stay afloat Change this place Make it home Not wasting up All these empty days All these sleepless nights You’ve been growing thin for years You feel your heartbeat A little softer here A little harder there A little harder No more night outside of Bangkok No more night outside of Bangkok You still escape No more night outside of Bangkok From yourself No more night outside of Bangkok Everytime No more night You board a plane No more night You still escape No more night From yourself No more night Everytime No more night You are my anchor
3.
4th of June 04:38
Oh these blood soaked stones Oh these bullet holes Oh you caring father Oh you weeping mother Beijing, China, late spring 1989 Years after Mao's death and the end of the cultural revolution, students and trade unionists take to the streets and demand democratic participation and social justice They occupy the gate of heavenly peace in the center of the city This is their story The iron rice bowl is broken They beat it to coins You're weeping on doorsteps It's filling the void We've made a thousand banners And took them to the streets Set tents up for the night shift We’re chanting for relief Our bodies been the ocean Our hearts been strong for weeks This place now holds a million We're far from being weak The tigers shouting out Bout tanks upon the streets We're building up these walls This is where we'll And now they move in And we see them Forming lines Pointing rifles at these young kids Hou Dejian says that we should leave now Or they will pin us to the stones Will everything now perish Under these crushing chains Will people be remembered For what they did this day Is heaven's peace upon us In these nights of guilt and shame In Beijing's blood red streets And now they move in And cut us up in halves And sweep away what's been left Of our days Our makeshift song Is in decay And in a sudden These men put me to the grave
4.
Golden 03:07
So I sail away From this old town So I sail away From this bone church So I sail away From this dark house So I sail away From these old smokes So I sail away From my family So I sail away From my memory So I sail away From my family So I sail away From you I sail away from
5.
I'm sitting on the couch And she tries her best To make me see all these things That I recently forgot The things I do The things I managed to do And how in the end Everything seems to work out Eventually And through all this time I felt you Inside my head How you sang of love and promise Lying in bed smiling And all the words that gild you I hope you keep them save I won't take them back After years and months I'm left with little to no idea About how we got each other So profoundly wrong I won't be a better person or lover After these days in the snow Just increasingly growing disconnected To myself, to family to friends To what I wish to be I'm just watching while myself Is slowing slipping through my fingers Did your honor really stay Or were you able to make a change All the best now to you I'm so sorry I didn't stay Couldn't stay I'm not lying down in bruises I stray around Having stones inside my stomach They keep me down But I won't let you cut me open And take them out yourself These stones are anchors now

credits

released May 26, 2019

Music: Daniel Tremel, Dominik Schmaderer, Kevin Aschauer, Manuel Weißenberger, Thomas Hackl
Lyrics: Thomas Hackl
Mixing & Mastering: Daniel Tremel
Album Art: Daniel Tremel

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The Weight of Water Vienna, Austria

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